Coming out changing how I feel about my gender?

[Jaye]

Basically before coming out I was kind of feeling not male and a bit female, but since then even over the past couple of weeks, it feels like its shifted. Like feeling that I am just neutrois and that bit of female has drifted away as I've become more comfortable with saying that I'm non-binary. Though I think maybe I was clinging onto identifying as female way way too long just because I wanted to have a binary identity and maybe that's why i ended up feeling a bit female.

Does this make sense to anyone?

[Lyn Aven]

Makes perfect sense to me. I share your experience -- coming out as genderfluid MADE my gender more fluid; once I wasn't fighting it so much, I was swinging back and forth and to new places that were in between and neither, and faster. One time I flip-flopped six times in two hours.

But keep an open mind -- the effect isn't necessarily permanent. Here I am six months later and I've settled back down into being mostly-male, sometimes androgyne, with occasional jaunts into other genders. If you find yourself drifting back to feeling feminine-neutrois, don't fight it: maybe that's just who you are.

[scrapetape]

Does this make sense to anyone?

Absolutely.

I went through a variant of this myself, though before fully coming out as Neutrois I was leaning a bit more toward maleness, I think partially as a rejection of my physical sex (f)...

For most of my life it was hard for me accept being something other than male or female, so I kind of flip flopped back and forth, trying to fit myself into one or the other...
but now that I've come to accept my ID of being "neither" I don't concern myself with that anymore. Like you said, I'm "just neutrois" and that's enough, it works for me. Something about it just "clicks."
It's hard to explain, haha.. but maybe you get it.

Hope this helps.

[bright_frost]

That makes perfect sense to me. I've gone through a bit of that too. I came out to my two best friends as genderqueer about a year and a half ago. Before that I was just feeling more or less gender-neutral, but after that I started leaning a bit toward masculine. I think it was more a rejection of the identity I had been clinging to prior to that. Then about 6 months ago I came out to all my roommates. Since then I've felt a little more balanced. I'm learning to deal with the fact that my body is female (although a binder and getting rid of my periods helps a lot) and learning to deal with my identity and make my body and appearance better match how I identify.