Like it is for a lot of people, gender identity can difficult to figure out or really understand, and it has been that way for me. I used to think that I am an andogyne and sometimes a female but recently I have come to the conclusion that I am only agendered. My mind has the qualities and such of a male and of a female, I like things that are feminine as well as things that are masculine, and I do not feel like I am a male nor a female in here (my mind). I cannot make myself identify as either and I also do not feel that I am a third gender or androgyne. I feel it that I am no gender at all.
As I sit here before my laptop in the cafe, I am surrounded by male and female bodies. The males here do not at all seem to reflect what I am. The females here also do not at all seem to reflect what I am. None of these beings share my gender identity. The great thing about being agendered is that I can think in any way and like anything I want to and not have to associate it with gender identity. I love this.. I love it. Never will I ever again identify as a male, a female, or a mix of the two. I am just me and I like the things that people just love placing into boxes labeled "male" or "female."
About my body, well, it is the male sex and I do not care to change it to be gender neutral in appearance. So, I am not Neutrois, just Agendered. I like to shave my arms, legs, and put on body moisture and mist, but it's not feminine or androgynous. It's just what I like.
Come to think of it, I have never felt like I am male or female since I was a child. When I turned 19 I tried to be masculine and I felt like I was pretending to be what I am not. Trying to be a female at age 21 didn't work either. And now I know what I am. If only I would had seen the obvious last year when I started to question my gender identity.
Your agendered gynosexual friend...
- Gwyn



