Interesting that this is brought up.
I've had a look over the information about grey-a, and feel that's about as good as it gets when explaining my current state. My only problem is wondering why I'm in this state, and if there's anything I can do to be more content with my sexuality. I've become very androphilic from straight up homosexual man/heterosexual woman.
I am also discovering myself having fantasies in BDSM, but far too timid to explore anything outside of my head, especially with admitting to my husband than I've turned out to be a bit of a kinker. :p I know this is something I've got to get the courage to do though, it's rather important, even if I never plan on taking any of the fantasies outside of my head.
D/s actually happens to be a bit of my cup of tea, but also a little bit of S&M (or, well, violence fetish; brawling, bruises, blood, that sort of stuff). The latter is something I would never dream of doing in real life, and ironically I'm actually very fearful of pain.
Being bigendered, I have to say more of the time my sexuality is from being a man- I rarely get interested in sex as a woman. Instead, the only times I get sexually aroused are when thinking of man and man, and very rarely when thinking of man and woman from the man's perspective. Unfortunately I was not born with typical male genitalia, and I did not marry someone under the pretense of homosexual male sex. I do not desire bottom surgery, and I feel there are sufficient sex toys to not need a permanent change.
Though I am terrified of openly admitting this, and stepping into a sex shop with the intention of buying the necessary equipment.