So as I said in my " Alone Amungst peers" thread I am an f2m dating ( planning to propose to) an m2f.
I am 25 she is 45. She is the most beautiful woman ever created in the entire history of the universe in my eyes. Kind, sweet, awesome, mostly understanding. She just started on her "E" Patches 20-something weeks ago and is going though "puberty" It's not so bad til the mood swings. But we are dealing.Almost everything that can go wrong has and it only makes our relationship THAT much STRONGER!
I have issues sometimes though. Dealing with her female emotions that shes always had but are magnafied by the E. And it is hard for me to beable to bring up some of my issues with her because then she gets into asking 100000 questions when I just want to be listened to. ( when I just need advice with how to go about not pissing her off)
But all in all it is amazing being with her.
I haven't decided yet if physical transition is right for me. for one I only began realizing what was "wrong" or "different" about me and I still love to wear make up and dress up girly for pictures and big dates and stuff. She keeps hinting she wants to give me a bj even though I don't have that kinda tool. she says it don't matter if I ever transition fully because she loves me and the strappy we decided we are getting has become more a part of me then just a toy now.
My worry is this. If shes day dreaming of me in male form. and having straight sexual encounters with me and if I do decide to stay the way I am and not care to be seen as a butch or dyke ... I am scared my physical body will not be enough for her and she will eventually seek out someone with the bits and pieces she wants. I love her more then life it's self. the only 2 things in the world I love more then her are my bio-children. I don't know what I would do if I lost her.
when she first came out to me I thought she was becoming a boy and I flipped .. I thought this because she was so obviouly a girl even though she though she was hiding her prissyness the best she could I saw though her wall and helped her bring out the real her I knew was in there. she used the phrase "I was born with an outtie not an innie" and I thought she meand her belly button
but she didn't. She eventually got it thought my head what she meant and I just shrugged and said " It's ok I still love you and you are still mine forever"Anyways, any ideas on how to get over my fear that she will leave me for someone with a tube snake?
