I have two friends. I'll make up names off the spot...
Judy and Sheryl.
Judy's 16 years old. She's got an older brother my age, 18. She's got a younger sister who I believe is 13 or 14... hard to tell with her; she acts much older sometimes. Well, Judy's mother was the first to accept and reach out to me. Judy is the same girl I might take to Prom as a friend. She is also the same girl who had a hysterectomy because at one point she had two uteruses (well, since birth, obviously). Only one of her uteruses was connected to her vagina, so the other would just fill up with blood every month and remain bloated. Judy's mother has experience in both physical and mental disorders, because her children have all had both. Judy's older brother has a lot of the same issues I have; generalized anxiety and panic attacks. Judy's little sister has the same blood disorder Judy has. It's called von willebrands
. Judy also suffers from depression, struggles with bipolar personality disorder and tries to work around attention deficit disorder. Judy's mother has had to take care of her 3 children and their many symptoms. I find it amazing that they manage. Judy's mother's husband is also bipolar, and Judy's mother is becoming diabetic and has high blood pressure. This family has a lot of health trouble but amazing hearts. I met Judy when she was in the 6th grade and I was in 8th. I saw her and her mother, and I swear, even though I'm not religious and don't believe in these things, and angel must have touched me. I walked up to them. They stood out from the crowd. "New here at this school?" I ask. Judy and I were instantly friends from that moment on, and have been friends since.
When I told Judy about my GID, she told her mother. I was perfectly okay with this. We all sat together one time and talked about it. Her mother told me that she hung out with transpeople when she was young because she was scared of having sex with men, and so she wanted to know if she could be gay or trans. She told me that hanging around these people could help me make a lot of discoveries. She's told me a lot of methods I can use to test if I am trans. For instance, she said if I gained up to a healthy weight (I weight about 85, a healthy area is more around 90-95 but I could go up to 115 and not be "overweight") and see how I feel then, because hormone distribution has to also do with body composition. She said then I'll really know for sure it isn't JUST a hormonal imbalance.
I've questioned hormonal imbalance for a long time. I had my period at 13 years old; a normal time to start. My breasts never really developed much, though. They have the milk sacs and all that, but they're just an A cup. Sometimes I worry that I was low in estrogen. I hope this isn't the case, because if they give me testosterone, my body could turn it into the estrogen it needs.
Judy's mom also suggested I watch some shows about transsexuals and transition so I can understand the process and see it first hand instead of just reading about it. I think it was an excellent suggestion.
So Judy's mom was very accepting of me. She is Catholic, but also believes in the New Age movement, like my mom.
Then there's Sheryl. She's 14 days older than me, except on leap year. I've been friends wit Sheryl since we were both in 2nd grade. Sheryl suffers from a mild to moderate form of antipersonality disorder, which can be really dangerous. She went to counseling, which was uneventful, because she felt like they couldn't help her. Sheryl was not very surprised when I told her I was trans. Her mom asked her if I was okay, because she noticed something different about me. Sheryl briefly, but not completely explained that I am trans. Her mom, a hardcore Catholic who does not believe in birth control or sex before marriage, was very easy going about this. She questioned, "Shouldn't [Elwood]'s mom be more concerned with the risk of the surgery than the act of it itself?" I was shocked to hear she said something along these lines. I have two religious women supporting me, and one "nonreligious" one telling me that God doesn't make mistakes (my mom said that for those who don't know).
So I'm frankly surprised.
My mom. New Age follower. Says not to force religious beliefs on anyone. Tells me God doesn't make mistakes.
Judy's mom. Catholic and New Age follower. She tells me to be honest with myself and cautious and find the true me.
Sheryl's mom. Catholic, hard core kind. But she didn't say I was a sinner or a heathen or that I was defying the word of God. She was most concerned about my safety.
I understand my mom is going to have a special bias; I am her
child. But both Sheryl's mom and Judy's mom have daughters. They understand what it is like to face difficulties with their kids. I just find it irritating and difficult. My mom is slowly giving up the arguments, but I know the war isn't over. When the doctor refers me testosterone, my mom is going to literally flip the shit. Probably say, "HOW WE GONNA PAY FOR THIS?" And I'm gonna say, "NOW I CAN GET A JOB, RIGHT?" I'm still considering moving out sometime this late summer...