Psychopomp wrote:I can identify completely. It's like you're on a treadmill. The trick is to find little things that give you goals. Video games are good for that. They don't help with the long term ambition but they'll help you run out the clock.
NightBlooming wrote:@ Murmur - yeah I totally get what you said about videogames. A lot of them are just - wow - so bad.
Are there any foods you like to make, any music or any particular smells you like? Any particular places you like going?
anyway, kind of off topic ( I might start a thread in chit chat tomorrow). But I found this website that's been wasting so much of my time. Basically its this guy (gay) who writes amazing reviews of books chapter by chapter. And writes reviews on good books but also totally takes down Twilight.
Also, another good time-waster:
Dave wrote:Instead of looking at the fact that you feel like you're just dragging around like it's a bad and aimless thing, look at it like you're at max potential: you're not tied to anything, you're not invested in anything, so you can really and honestly do whatever you want in any direction you want to go in!
AlexTheSane wrote:I wish I had signed onto the board earlier this week. This sounds like serious depression. Maybe it's the way you put it in your original post (by the way, are you actually thinking of killing yourself? If the answer is "yes" or even "maybe", call someone, a hotline or something, please). The whole lack of purpose/anhedonia thing is just very in-tune with my own experiences of depression.
What do you do during the day? If that answer is "nothing" or "sleeping", change that. Find something to do. Preferably something you like, but lacking anything like that just something that doesn't make you feel worse. I don't know what you do, what your responsibilities are or where you are in life, but definitely make time for you. Schedule your day a little bit, nothing too ambitious just "wake up time" and "meal time" (the remarks you make about food kind of worry me a little too, not eating or being ambivalent about food can be a sign of depression).
Part two is finding someone to talk to about this. I guarantee that there is someone in your life that you can open up to a little bit about these feelings. If you're worried, don't even think about the details, just with the general "I feel lost" or "I feel like I don't fit in", someone who knows a little bit about what's going on with you. If you don't feel comfortable doing that, do it here but in a lot more detail. Not everyone will read wall-o-text type posts, but even just getting it out there in the world get take away some of the negative feelings.
Hope this helps.
Murmur wrote:I can't talk to anyone I know in person about how I feel
Kass-ID wrote:What would it be like if you could talk to someone you know... who would you chose to talk to? what would you tell them?
Dave wrote:I have been reading your replies and it seems like you...no offense...like to come up with excuses to keep you stuck in your same place. It sounds like you'd rather desire death than take the plunge and direct your own life. Why? I couldn't say. Most people are just afraid, and if that's your case you definitely aren't alone. People in our situations don't hold the monopoly on being afraid to take charge. Many people experience it, some at different levels. You have options...you even said you tried calling but hung up, nervous. There are steps you can take, you just don't. Why don't you?
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